October 10, 2010

Fat City Café

The bacon is crispy and amazing and drips grease on my dollar bill green vintage wash tee-shirt (GAP kids $5.99) but its skin tight and should dry fast.

O Fat City! Prof. Gomez and I get there on a painfully sunny Sunday just before noon after a rough night. Aching heads, heavy bodies and tired souls our resurrection begins instantly as we walk in the door. Gomez Irishes up our coffee with a generous dash of Jameson from the flask he keeps tucked in the inner pocket of his houndstooth Balenciaga jacket (Neiman Marcus $899) and we’re off to the races. Gomez goes Farmer’s Sizzle and I’m Corned Beef Hash, 2 eggs over easy and a double side of bacon. Prof. Bushaw arrives fashionably late and tastefully dressed in a pale pink Vivienne Westwood number (Saks 5th Ave $1499).

We finish the coffee and move on to Bloody Mary’s and our food arrives. The bacon is crispy and amazing and drips grease on my dollar bill green vintage wash tee-shirt (GAP kids $5.99) but its skin tight and should dry fast. From there breakfast proceeds with its usual Fat City perfection and soon we feel strength returning to our battered selves and become lost in the murmur of conversation and the delicate clang of silverware.

[Please note that this short fictional story is 100% false – minus fat city café descriptions].

By Ross Caldwell

Pros

  • Good breakfast
  • Nice ambiance
  • Reasonably priced

Cons

  • Weekend mornings long wait
  • Limited seating
  • Food can take a bit – sometime